Monday, September 23, 2019

Are You Being Manipulated?

You don’t always know when you are being manipulated, it’s not until after most of us realize we were manipulated into doing or giving something we did not want to do or give. Is the relationship one-sided? You are doing all the giving and the other person is doing all the taking. The person cannot take no for an answer.

When you do say no they try to guilt-trip you, say your selfish or a bad person. Do they threaten to leave the relationship when you don’t give them what they want? Most toxic and manipulative people have selfish motives and needs.

 When they talk it’s all about them, then when you try to talk about something they either change the subject or are not interested in what you have to say. Do you feel like your energy is drained around this person? Pay attention and observe. Listen to your gut instincts.

Some of the signs or ways that tell someone is trying to manipulate you are as follows.

1. Acting as if they were above you.

2. Condescending comments/tonality.

3. Jokes at your expense.

4. Dirty looks and death stares.

5. Silent treatment.

6. Ignoring you / playing hard to get.

7. Acting like a martyr or victim.

8. Using emotions.

9. Passive-aggressive.

10. Purposely being difficult.

11. Trying to exploit your weaknesses against you.

12. Offering you the illusion of choice.

13. Trying to get you to make public commitments.

14. Trying to get you to keep a promise that you never made.

15. One-sided reporting.

16. Frame control.

How Do You Know if You're Being Manipulated?

☝. Is someone asking you to do things you normally would not and have never done for anyone else?

☝. Is this person making you feel uncomfortable?

☝. Is this person making you question your own deep-seated beliefs, morals, etc.?

☝. Is this person making you feel guilty?

☝. Is this person asking you to do things or provide them with money or material possessions to prove your love or loyalty?

☝. Is this person asking you to do things that he or she would not do?

☝. Is this person telling you that society, family, etc. is wrong and that what they say is the only truth?

☝. Is this person telling you that something you know for a fact is difficult or wrong is actually easy or okay?

I could go on and on and on. This is simply what I came up with off the highest of my head. Trust your gut. If you feel uncomfortable or are doubting someone’s motives that’s a good enough reason to avoid that person and stay away from them. We basically know what is right and what makes sense. When we feel that something is wrong with the version of reality that someone else hands us we feel uncomfortable. That’s part of our built-in self-preservation instinct. When someone makes you uncomfortable, run away as fast as you can. Even if they have convinced you that you’re in love, remind yourself that you are in love with a fantasy that does not really exist. Your gut knows what is real. Runaway and don’t look back.